excerpts from The Beautifull Book

She Wanted to Know What Love Was That You Cd. Fall In

2011-03-20T15:24:00.000-07:00

she wanted to know what love was
that you cd. fall in.
i said a pit, and hope someone falls in w/ you.
she imagined, she said, a door
the one one you wd. love having an open
door which you fall in - only,
she laughed, i fall and hit something, a wall.
her scribbles darken and fill a thick bar,
the brick wall i suppose that brings out
those bruises around her eyes.
you know it is love when it hurts i said
and wished i cd. say more about the
crazy buzzing ache we call love --- i guess
i'm in love just about all the time, which
was something i cd. say and laugh ---
too true to be important.

she wanted a way to say love is a hurt
and doesn't even really happen.

i wanted to say how well i knew what she
meant. i wd. have said, only, well,
love is a hurt and a pit --- i've fallen in
too deep to to believe anyone up there can
hear me. love is a door that has
always been locked, i hardly bother to
see if it might be open this time.

A poem for Cathy Coffee, who worked at Downtown Grounds. it is in her handwriting as a had copied out a version for her , she then hand wrote a version when i asked (a second time) for a copy of the poem. I don't know your real last name, Cathe Coffee, but we loves it forever Bagginssss…

Beaumont Jail, intro [cont.]

2009-08-26T22:28:00.000-07:00

e---------------

"did you ever see slow water?"

"hey jay, got some e?"

superman never did show up. I decided it was time I was super myself.

mosquito I crashed their computers while I stalled for the film crew to show up. they never did show for my demonstration of real magick.

R

A History Lesson: the Old War

2008-06-26T23:00:00.000-07:00

Sparks and Stones splashed in muck
Spellbound
Dragons dream
Mountains

Spell Struck
All the Ogres turn to Stone

The Fire is Green

2008-02-02T12:56:00.001-08:00

THE MOTHER

Nature is a living candle. The sun lights seeds which spark into Life.
THE GIRLS
(unison)
The fire is green.
THE BOY

(whirls)
Whirled into being… spiral into the center… the fire is green!
THE GIRLS
(unison)
The fire is green.
THE MOTHER
Lava fields cool and re-ignite with grasses.
THE BOY
The fire is green.
THE GIRLS
(unison)
The fire is green.
THE MOTHER
(points to APPLE TREE)
Blazing torches bright with apples.
THE GIRLS
(unison)
The fire is green.
THE BOY
The fire is green.
THE MOTHER
(chants)
WAIT.
THE BOY
(waits)
The fire is green. Grows hotter, turns red.
THE GIRLS
(unison)
The fire is green.
Angle on APPLE. The first blush of pink.
THE MOTHER
WAIT.
THE GIRLS
(unison)
The fire is green.
THE BOY
The fire is green. It burns no hotter than sunlight on rocks, or a steaming pile of decay.
THE MOTHER
WAIT.
Angle on BRAMBLES heavy with BERRIES.
THE BOY
The fire is green, the berry turns purple, is good to eat.
THE MOTHER
TASTE IT.

The Beautifull Monster

2008-02-02T09:35:00.000-08:00

She is Beautifull
but you must not say so
she sez "I'm so fat"
and wonders what you want

She is Beautifull
but does not want you to know
stomping around the City streets
in her boots and frumpy clothes

She is Beautifull
but does not care about that
something she does not own
and everyone wants a piece of

She is presents in her absence
She is absent in her presence
She dances alone in the mirror in the dark w/ her eyes closed

[Love] You cd. fall in

2007-08-08T17:26:00.001-07:00

she wanted to know what love was
that you could fall in.
i said a pit. and hope that someone falls in w/ you.
she imagined, she said, a door.
the one you would love having an open
door which you fall in – only,
she laughed, i fall and hit something, a wall.
her scribbles darken and fill a thick bar –
the brick wall i suppose that brings out
those bruises around her eyes.
you know it’s love when it hurts i said,
and wished i could say more about the
crazy buzzing ache we call love – i guess
i’m in love just about all the time, which
was something i could say and laugh –
too true to be important.
she wanted a way to say love is a hurt
and doesn’t even really happen.
i wanted to say how well i knew what she
meant.
i would have said, only, well,
love is a hurt and a pit i’ve fallen in
too deep to believe anyone up there can
hear me.
love is a door that has always been locked.
i hardly bother to see if it might be open this time.

2007-05-23T11:33:00.001-07:00

hell is the place where bad things happen
an eternity things happen
hell is
dark fire
it burns
y don’t know why
goin’ down and
already there
hell is the place nothing works out as planned
hell was paved
w/ the block meant to be a Spaceship

ATOM fire in the Sun
well, the Door don’t open that wide
Fall and hit the ground
Hit the ground and break the ground
(a mucous smile on a stony heart)
Fall and the fire dark burns
y don’t know why
buried in yr fall
there ain’t no door open that wide

2005-08-17T17:09:00.000-07:00

The Parade

the boy stands apart, tho
pressed by the crowd.
this is not his parade.
he never got a parade,
even tho he saved the world.

the clowns and jugglers,
dancers on stilts;
the old soldiers, survivors
of foreign wars;
the beauties seated on floats;
it all makes the boy cry,
alone in the world,
an escapee from the destruction
of his world---
a king there, almost
a pauper here, tho alive
and filled w/ potential.

the boy longs to join the parade
his lonely wander
w/ a satchel of seeds ache-ing
for germination weighing
his shoulder, an off-balance
gait,

already the boy has left
the parade, tho still pressed by
the crowd. his tears---
[clowns make him cry]
open a doorway and
he struggles thru the weeds
alert for plants that are medicine

one of the Beauties sees
the boy w/ an absent look
tears unwiped course his cheeks
the boy sees her seeing him
and, proud, hiding his shame,
offers her a weak smile,---
for a moment her automated
wave is for him,
for a moment it is
his parade. then she is gone.

Tears and laughter mingle
in his throat. he turns
and the crowd parts for him.
before his disappearance into
himself
he blesses the soldiers, beauties
and clowns.
alone again, searching among
the weeds for magick.